Letting go
by akiyume kye
Summary: UPDATED. Fuji runs. But what is he escaping from? TezuFuji
1. Chapter 1: Escape

**Letting go**

by akiyume kye

**Disclaimer**: Until the day I become Takeshi Konomi, I will not own pot.

**Pairing**: TezuFuji

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**Chapter 1: Escape**

He ran.

He ran as fast as his legs could carry him.

From everything.  
From everyone.

From… himself.

Tears streaked the tensai's delicate cheeks as he ran on.  
His legs took him aimlessly.  
His mind was blank.  
His heart churned with emotion deeper than anyone knew.  
The pavement before him was a blur as more tears filled his brilliant blue eyes.

He ran.

He ran as fast as his heart could beat.

From every dream. From every hope.

From… himself.

And still… he ran on.

He was escaping.

From reality. From the truth.

_Why?_ Fuji kept asking. _Why?_  
Silence screamed back.  
There was no answer.

A hundred running footsteps.  
A thousand unheard questions.  
A million fragments of a broken heart.

He ran on.

And still, he didn't stop.

He didn't want to stop.  
Because if he did, the pain would catch up with him.  
Because if he did, he would lose.

To himself.  
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And then he stopped.

Or rather, he was stopped.

By a steel grip that held his slender wrist tightly.  
By a hand that was callused and big.  
By a heart that was beating with his.

Fuji stopped.  
And he didn't turn back.  
Because if he did, he might regret it.  
Because if he did, he might lose.

Heavy laboured pants escaped from him.  
He took a deep breath.  
And then another.

But the tears refused to stop.

_Stop it! Just stop it!_ He cried out in his mind.

But still.  
The tears flowed.  
The tears continued to flow, with a mind of their own.  
Defiant, they ignored the prodigy's command.

Pain.  
Hopelessness.  
Broken dreams.  
Fragments of a heart.

They all poured out from the weary soul.

It was too much.  
Too much for the tensai to bear.

He didn't deserve it.  
He really didn't.

And yet, it happened.

And yet, he wasn't spared.

Fuji steeled himself.  
He couldn't lose.  
He just couldn't.

Not to himself.

Yet.  
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The prodigy tried to wrench his arm out of the tight grip, but the owner of that hand held on.

Frustration.  
Anger.  
Pain.

Emotions tugged at his heart.  
They tugged pleadingly at what was left of it.

_Whoever you are_, Fuji screamed, unheard.  
_Let go of me.  
Just let go of me.  
And let me be. _

The grip didn't loosen.  
And Fuji got angry.

He pried open his ocean blue eyes and spun around abruptly.  
He would stare down that person  
He would let him know better than to mess with Fuji Syuusuke.

He spun around…

And was met with the grim face of the Seigaku captain.

A gasp escaped the lips of the tensai.  
His heart skipped a beat.  
His legs were rooted to the ground.  
His mind was in a whirl.

He had come.  
But Fuji didn't want him there.

He had come.  
But Fuji couldn't face him then.

He had come.

But he was too late.  
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Both men didn't move.

For what seemed like eternity, they stared into each others eyes.

Silence screamed across them.

Fuji couldn't breathe.

His mind hissed at him.  
_Look away._

But his heart could not.

He could not tear his eyes from the beautiful creature standing in front of him.  
_Look away._  
He could not.  
He still couldn't.

And then hazel eyes spoke.  
Those hazel eyes.  
The eyes of speech. The eyes of emotion.  
The eyes that could speak volumes.

Fuji was caught in it.  
Like in a trance, it froze the tensai.

_Tell me._  
The eyes spoke.  
The eyes of a person who never needed many words.  
The eyes of a captain.  
A young handsome man.

The eyes…  
Of Tezuka Kunimitsu.  
Those eyes…  
Those beautiful eyes…

Then Fuji snapped out of that piercing gaze.

It was a battle he had to fight.

And he must win.  
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Suppressing his initial shock, he made a weak attempt to bury his emotions.  
Then forcing his lips into a tight smile, he faced the captain.

Daijoubu, Fuji had simply said.

But Tezuka knew.  
His heart could feel it.  
The turmoil.The anguish.  
The pain.  
The grief.  
All of which, had enveloped the tensai.

The prodigy was suffering.And yet he chose to hide it from those around him.  
The prodigy was in pain.  
And yet he chose to put up the smiling mask that so often fooled the crowd.

He would rip off that mask.  
Yes, he would.  
He would rip off that mask and look into the eyes of the real Fuji Syuusuke.  
He would rip off that mask and find the inner tensai.  
And when he said he would, he would.

Fuji continued to smile.  
It tired him more and more as seconds ticked by without any exchange of words.  
The smile that looked so unreal.  
The smile that he thought could protect him.  
Yet it was this very smile that broke him.

Because Tezuka knew.  
He just did.

The captain's lips parted, and his deep voice came seconds later.

"Let it out."

It was spoken with such firmness and authority.  
Yet not a statement, nor an order.  
It was a quiet request. A silent plea.

_Let it out…_

3 words.  
Just 3 words.

And it broke the tensai.  
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Fuji's feet gave way beneath him.  
He could stand it no more. _(literally)_

As the buchou saw him quake, he gently released his hold on the tensai.

He collapsed.  
The pain had caught up with him.  
The pain that was still embedded in him.  
The pain which was eating into him was back.  
And it was more intense than ever.  
It had returned, more sinister than before.

It had returned.  
And Fuji had fallen.

But he would not lose.

Not yet.  
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The moment he hit the pavement beneath him, tears sprung into his eyes.  
The pain that he had so desperately run away from had never left him.  
It was still there.  
It was feasting .  
Eating Fuji.  
Eating Fuji alive.

_Help me… Someone help me…_

Disobedient tears rolled down his pale cheeks as the floodgates opened.  
There was a thunderstorm in his life.  
A thunderstorm that drenched him in despair.  
Lightning, that had long shot his fragile heart into countless fragments.

It was those fragments that made up Fuji.  
Yet they were the very fragments that lay strewn haphazardly deep inside the tensai.

Tezuka remained standing, looking down at the sight that had left him numb.  
The stern expression he had put on ritually without fail fell.  
Just like the boy crying at his feet had fallen.

Emotions tugged at the captain.  
His eyes that were moist threatened to release tears that he never knew he had.

_Fuji…_

His friend of 3 years.  
But he wasn't just any friend.

He was Fuji Syuusuke, the child prodigy.  
The smiling, delicate tensai.  
The one that could understand without probing.  
The one that could understand without words.

He was closest friend Tezuka ever had.

And Tezuka was sure Fuji felt the same.  
Good, close friends.  
That was what they were.  
They hadn't needed any outspoken agreement to put that term to their friendship.  
They just knew it.

Still, the captain wished that they could have become something more.  
Something… just something.

Yet there he stood, eyes looking at the grief-stricken tensai crying…  
He could only watch Fuji cry, being there as a good, close friend.  
And nothing more.

For there lay a line.  
A line that neither dared to cross.  
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The pain that had tormented Fuji continued to work its way through him, tearing apart his very being.  
The pain that he had not fully released from running away was there again.  
Every bit it took tormented the frail tensai.

He had to release it.  
Even if it was in front of the person he so deeply loved.

_Tezuka…_

Fuji was sure that the buchou felt the same way towards him.  
A mutual attraction that never developed beyond friendship.  
There it stopped- good, close friends.  
And then an invisible line was drawn.

Neither had tried to step past that line.  
They didn't dare to.

It was left that way.  
Love so strong, yet never expressed.  
Love so powerful, yet never displayed.  
Love so invincible, yet never spoken.

Both men had left their undying love for each other behind that line, each making a silent vow never to love another but each other.  
Even if it was forbidden.

They left it behind that line, never picking it up again.

The invisible line that neither had crossed.

It was at that very moment that Tezuka came to realization.

He had never left his love for Fuji behind that line.  
It had remained dormant all those years, in his heart.  
Dormant, yet dangerously close to a surprise explosion.  
And so it was, bubbling, foaming, threatening… for release.

Biting his lip, the buchou grimaced at the sight of the crumpled body that lay on the pavement before him.

_No. _

_I can't cross that line._

_Or can I?_

**To be continued… **

A/N: I happen to enjoy writing cliffhanger fics, so meanwhile, let your mind run wild.

Spoilers: Tezuka hesitates at the line. Does he cross it? And does Fuji? But what exactly is Fuji trying to escape from in the first place? Well... I'm not telling. Guess.

Hmm. And then again...  
Dunno if I should continue. Wasn't very satisfied with this fic.

Still, reviews will be greatly appreciated. Thank you.


	2. Chapter 2: Forbidden Love

**Letting go**

by akiyume kye

Disclaimer: Until the day I become Takeshi Konomi, I will not own pot.

Pairings: TezuFuji

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**Chapter 2: Forbidden Love**

Both Fuji and Tezuka stood at the line.

A single step, and they would cross.  
Into a forbidden zone.  
Into an unknown future.

One step.  
That was all it took.

Yet that one step, neither dared to take.

The risk.  
The unknown.

They were scared, as much as neither admitted to it.

But both men needed it.  
It wasn't a selfish want.  
No, it wasn't a desire.  
It was a need.  
And that need, was their love.  
Forbidden love.

Tezuka shivered.  
In anticipation. In fear. In silence.

His leg seemed to have had a mind of it own.  
It shot out, tip almost touching the forbidden line.

And then it stopped.

The captain had retracted.

He couldn't do it.

He just couldn't.

He wasn't strong enough.

_Don't regret it,_ a still small voice spoke.  
Tezuka flinched.

He had a chance.

But would he take it?

The captain wavered.  
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_ Flashback _

Both Seigaku regulars were the only ones left in the tennis club room.

The radio was on, waiting for the news about the weather.

The rain would be light, with no snow in sight. Just a slight drizzle, nothing to worry about.  
So Tezuka set himself packing his things into his bag.

Then that song played.

_**I do swear  
that I'll aways be there.  
I'd give anything and everything  
And I will always care.  
Through weakness and strength,  
Happiness and sorrow,  
For better or worse,  
I will love you with every beat of my heart.**_

He stopped his packing.

_**From this moment life has begun  
From this moment you are the one  
Right beside you is where I belong  
From this moment on**_

_**From this moment I have been blessed  
I live only for your happiness  
And for your love I'd give my last breath  
From this moment on**_

_**I give my hand to you with all my heart  
Can't wait to live my life with you, can't wait to start  
You and I will never be apart  
My dreams came true because of you**_

Tears weld up in a certain tensai's eyes, but he kept his smile plastered.  
_How appropriate, Tezuka… A song meant for us…_

_**From this moment as long as I live  
I will love you, I promise you this  
There is nothing I wouldn't give  
From this moment on**_

_**You're the reason I believe in love  
And you're the answer to my prayers from up above  
All we need is just the two of us  
My dreams came true because of you  
**  
**From this moment as long as I live  
I will love you, I promise you this**_

_**There is nothing I wouldn't give  
From this moment on…**_

As if frozen in the beauty of the song, none of them could move even after the song had ended.

It was a song.  
But not just any song.

It was a song… meant for them.  
A song… that was so fitting.

"That was beautiful…" Fuji's eyes were in full view, shining with a new light.  
Yet as he looked over at Tezuka, he knew.

The light dimmed.

Pursuing their mutual emotions was a task that seemed impossible.  
It wasn't just impossible.  
It was forbidden.

So there the line was drawn.

_ End of Flashback_  
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The lyrics came easily to Tezuka.

_**You're the reason I believe in love  
And you're the answer to my prayers from up above  
All we need is just the two of us  
My dreams came true because of you**_

A single tear escaped his brown eyes.

He knew what he had to do.

Even if it meant taking a risk.  
Even if it meant stepping into the unknown.

The teardrop fell onto Fuji's fingers.  
He looked up.

_Tezuka…_

The captain slowly bent down and came face to face with the person of his dreams.

He hesitated.

His foot was nearing the line. A millimeter more, and he would cross the line.

One millimeter.

_**From this moment life has begun  
From this moment you are the one  
Right beside you is where I belong  
From this moment on  
**_

_Fuji…_

_You're worth it._

Tezuka reached out and pulled Fuji into a tight embrace.

He foot had crossed the line.

_I'm waiting, Fuji…  
Please come…_  
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Fuji's body was limp against Tezuka.

He didn't know how to react.

Tezuka had crossed the line.  
The line they had silently consented to.

Their line…

Fuji's hands slowly lifted to return the hug.

He felt himself being drawn to Tezuka, like a tennis ball trapped in the Tezuka zone.

A millimeter away to the forbidden love.

It was closing in.

Half a millimeter.

And then he froze.

Tezuka felt Fuji's body stiffen in the embrace.

_Fuji…  
Cross the line… our line…  
Please… give us this chance…_

"NOOO!" Fuji cried out, pushing himself away from Tezuka.  
"I can't…We can't…"

The foot was withdrawn.

**To be continued…**

A/N: Not well written, but hope it wasn't_ that_ bad.  
Anyway, that song wasn't mine. If I could write songs like that, I wouldn't be here writing fanfics.  
It's entitled "From this moment" by Shania Twain. Sweet song.  
Ermm. Maybe you thought the song wasn't relevant but, well… dunno.

Spoilers: Will Fuji ever step past the line? And how will Tezuka react to Fuji's decision? Still ain't telling what Fuji was running away from.

Reviews will be appreciated. Thank you.


	3. Chapter 3: Un understandable

**Letting go**

by akiyume kye

Disclaimer: Until the day I become Takeshi Konomi, I will not own pot.

Pairings: TezuFuji

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**Chapter 3: Un-understandable**

Tezuka felt betrayed.  
The effort he had made to painstakingly cross that line had gone to waste.

Fuji had rejected him.

The captain released his hold on Fuji.  
His pride had been destroyed.

"I understand." Tezuka managed to say.  
But in his heart, he knew he would never understand.  
He had thought that Fuji would willingly come to him.  
He had known of Fuji's feelings for him way before his had developed for the other.

As he pulled himself up from the ground, he couldn't find the courage to look into the tensai's blue eyes.

The absurdity of the situation struck him.  
How could someone who loved him so much turn him down?

There were things that Fuji wasn't telling him.

Secrets...

that could kill.  
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_Tezuka_, Fuji tried to say.  
But no words came out of his mouth.  
He watched as Tezuka walked away in the distance, shoulders slouched, hair ruffled.  
The tensai had seen defeat and sorrow etched in the other's face.

More tears slid down his cheeks.

_Gomen ne, Tezuka.  
It would only hurt more if you knew why._  
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Both men acted indifferently at school, Fuji smiling and Tezuka frowning.  
But in each, lay a broken heart.

At tennis practice, everything went about like normal days were.  
And the only thing that had caused a stir was the lack of a certain smiling tensai's presence beside the buchou.  
Fuji had took to standing on his own, smile ever present on his face.

Everyone noticed it, but none bothered to question.  
Both were scary people, and no one wanted to incur their wrath least their question be an innocent provocation.

Ryusaki-sensei had arranged for there to be friendly matches between the regulars that day.  
Oddly, Tezuka noticed, Fuji had frowned at the mention of having to play a game.

Willing himself to stop looking at Fuji, he stepped aside to take in a deep breath.  
_He's acting like nothing happened at all so you can do the same.  
All right… act normal.  
Normal._  
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The pairings were decided on and the regulars went of to their assigned courts to proceed with their matches.

Echizen and Momoshiro were complaining about having to play against the Golden pair, while Kaidoh was hissing at his misfortune of having to play against a data freak.

Fuji and Kawamura were left.

_Singles_, Fuji thought. _Can I do it?_  
For the first time in his life, he dreaded it.  
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As the tensai sat down to tighten his shoelaces, he contemplated forfeiting the match but decided against it.  
It was his good friend, Kawamura after all, and he couldn't let him down.

He looked up gingerly to be faced with a burning Kawamura, waving his racket in the air wildly and screaming at the top of his lungs.  
"BURNING! COME ON!"

Letting out a sigh, Fuji slowly made his way to his starting position.

It was going to be a bad day.  
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Shaking his head to clear of the fuzziness that had clouded his vision, Fuji glanced over at Kawamura and gave him a wide smile.

_Sorry Taka-san, but I have to finish this game quickly._

"Game and set, Fuji to serve," came the call.

Fuji braced himself.  
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Meanwhile, Echizen and Momo were putting up a weak fight against the well-known Golden pair. Their Ah-un strategy had failed them against the other two. Frustration was building up, and both stubborn boys refused to lose this way. When Tezuka saw a smirk playing up on Echizen's lips, he knew that they would somehow manage to pull it off.

The buchou stopped at the next court and saw the lone figure of Inui standing in the middle of the court. Kaidoh was no where to be seen. The sun shone brightly and Inui's glasses caught a glint. He picked up his data book and started scribbling his new found data of his kouhai's reaction to his new vege juice. Tezuka pushed aside the thought of grabbing that book and tearing it into pieces and proceeded on to the court beside it.  
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"5-0. Fuji to serve."

Tezuka blinked.  
He glanced at his watch.  
The match had only begun 10 minutes ago.

Kawamura's face was flushed and he was panting heavily after running to and fro so many times.  
He was surprised that Fuji had used all of his triple counters already.

The buchou stood by the sidelines, unblinking.  
_He wants to end this game fast._  
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Fuji's heart was pumping hard. His vision was almost gone and he was panicking deep inside, though the trademark smile was still plastered on his lips. But the smile was weak and strained, his lips deathly pale.

_5 more minutes… That's all I can spare…_  
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Tezuka stood in silence as he observed the match before him.  
It was unlike Fuji to use all his triple counters in such a short period of time, especially for a friendly match.  
Besides, it was disturbing enough that the tensai was obviously aiming to finish the match under 15 minutes.  
A pleasant and kind boy, Fuji had always played to the strength of his opponent, never revealing his true potential.

But today, the brown haired boy was different.  
He was aiming to win in less than 15 minutes, and he was serious about it.

_Fuji…_  
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True enough, the match ended with a love game favoring Fuji in the time period he had set for himself.

As Fuji walked towards the net to shake Kawamura's hand, he felt the world spinning around him and darkness threatened to overcome. Unsteady steps approached Kawamura and a weak handshake was given.  
Kawamura was unfortunately still equipped with his racket, and he almost broke Fuji's hand with his grip.  
"BURNING! THAT WAS SUPER! GREATO!"

The tensai panicked when the over-excited boy refused to let go of his hand and asked for another match.  
After many unsuccessful attempts in freeing his hand, he gave Kawamura a hard push and managed to free himself.  
Mumbling an inaudible apology, he ran out of the court at lightning speed.

Kawamura was left sitting on the court in a daze, unable to comprehend what had just happened. Fuji had never been this rough before. And he swore upon seeing a look of uneasiness and panic flooding the tensai's unusually pale face before he had run off.  
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Practice had long ended, but Fuji was no where to be seen. Oishi walked from one end to the other in the small tennis club room. Fuji's bag still laid leaning against the wall. There was no racket inside the bag, so the fuku buchou concluded that he hadn't come for his bag.

Tezuka stood over Fuji's bag, wondering what to do with it, when something caught his eye.

Fully unzipping the bag, he reached inside and took out a packet of tablets.  
And then another.  
And another.  
Over 10 packets of tablets were in the buchou's hand by the time he finished emptying the compartment.

_What is Fuji doing with so much medicine?_

Tezuka turned over one packet to read its label, but a hand was placed over it before he could decipher the medical terms. He looked up.

"Fuji!" He gasped. Embarrassed to be caught snooping into the latter's belongings, he couldn't think of anything to say.

"Fuji! Where have you been! We've been waiting for you for over an hour!" The motherly Oishi stepped in and confronted Fuji, a worried frown on his forehead.

The tensai simply smiled in return. Swiftly taking the packets of tablets from Tezuka's hands, he stuffed them into his bag hurriedly and was soon out of the door.

"Ja ne!" And he was off.

Both the buchou and fuku buchou were left staring at a closed door. Oishi peered over at Tezuka and saw his grim expression.

"Tezuka… something is not right."

He was only meet with silence as Tezuka remained motionless, turning over the situation in his mind.  
_Fuji… what is it that you're hiding from me?_

**To be continued…**

A/N: Ok ok, hold the rotten eggs please. So it didn't turn out that nicely. My apologies. Maybe I really should stop here and let you construct your own story, shouldn't I?

But still, do R&R. Thanks.

Spoilers (hmmm, if I do continue, that is): Tezuka tries to find out what had happened to Fuji. Pale lips, weak playing, astonishing number of packets of tablets… He knew something was wrong. But Fuji doesn't know if he should tell Tezuka… or feed him a lie.


	4. Chapter 4: Absence

**Letting go**

by akiyume kye

Disclaimer: Until the day I become Takeshi Konomi, I will not own pot.

Pairings: TezuFuji

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**Chapter 4: Absence**

He plopped himself onto the sofa and let out a laboured sigh.  
Rubbing the back of his head where he had knocked when he fainted in school after practice, he frowned.

Things weren't going well.  
They had almost found out.

The truth.  
The truth behind his actions.  
The truth that he was hiding from everyone.

He wanted to run away.  
To free himself to the baggage that was weighing him down.  
To love who he wanted to love.  
To say what he wanted to say

But he couldn't.  
The tensai just couldn't.

The baggage wouldn't leave him. It was a part of him.  
It was the truth that he was keeping from everyone he knew.

The truth that he couldn't reveal.

The truth…  
that could kill.

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Tezuka paced to and fro in his room, occasionally stopping to look at the photograph of the Seigaku regulars that Fuji had taken at the mountaintop where they had watched the sun rise together. His eyes fell upon the blue eyed, smiling tensai.

Something pierced his heart.  
There it was… again.  
That feeling.  
The feeling of losing the person you love most.  
The heartache, the pain.

It was all coming back.

He couldn't forget it, no matter how hard he tried._  
How could someone who loves you so much turn you away?_

It was unexplainable. An enigma surrounding Fuji that he couldn't seem to understand.  
He wanted to know why.  
He wanted to know why he did what he did.

There were questions. Millions of them.  
But Tezuka couldn't get them out of his mouth.

Was he afraid of the answer? Or did he expect no reply?  
The tensai was unpredictable. And Tezuka did not know what to do.

The events of the day flashed past him once again, and he found himself back in the scene when he had found those packets of tablets.

Fuji had been quick to cover up the packets before he had a chance to read what was on them.

Was he on drugs?

Impossible.

That wasn't like Fuji Syuusuke.  
But then again, he _was_ unpredictable.

Drugs…  
Could it really be? That the prodigy was now addicted to drugs?

It was only a guess, but still, it angered the buchou.  
He felt his blood boiling, and fury was eating into him.

_Could this be why you rejected me?  
Could this be why you turned my love for you away?_

_Fuji__… what has become of you?_

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Kawamura was disturbed. The sushi wasn't well done, the plates half-heartedly washed, the tables left dirty and messy. The boy could not concentrate. The game he had with Fuji was still fresh in his mind.

It had been different today.  
And it felt wrong.

What it was, he didn't know, as he sat in a daze behind the counter, oblivious to the orders of the customers.

His father looked over at him and shook his head. He pulled Kawamura away from the counter and forced him up the stairs to have an early night.

The lights were off, the air was cool, and the night was calm.  
But Kawamura could not sleep.

The match continued to play in his head.  
And he spent the rest of the night, tossing and turning restlessly in bed.

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Fuji woke up.  
Again.

He felt his lungs constricting, his throat closing in on him.  
He couldn't breathe. He didn't have the energy to.

He frantically got up and felt his way through the darkness to his bag. He took out some tablets and swallowed several down at a go. Settling himself next to his bag, his eyes welled up with tears.

The pain. Turmoil. Confusion.  
They were all playing in tandem.

It wasn't fair.  
It just wasn't.

He didn't deserve this.  
It was too painful to bear.

_Why? Why me?_  
His questions were left unanswered. Prayers never heard.  
Everyone seemed to have forsaken him.

He was alone.  
And he was afraid.

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The tensai failed to turn up for morning practice that day, but Tezuka dismissed it as having overslept. The other regulars were not so sure. They had witnessed Fuji's match the day before too, and everyone knew that something was wrong.

"He will run laps later. Continue with your practice," the buchou ordered the regulars.

Walking out of the courts, he looked around for any sign of the tensai, but he could see none. Frowning, Tezuka retreated into the tennis club room, and there, he waited patiently to confront Fuji.

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He never made it for morning practice.

Tezuka packed his things and waited for a few minutes more, but still, there was no sign of Fuji. He was gradually becoming irritated at Fuji's irresponsibility of not coming for practice, but decided not to let it affect him. After all, there was nothing between him and Fuji, was there?

Nothing. Nothing at all.

He left the room, locked it, and headed for his first class.

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"Kikumaru! What's the answer for question 79?"

The sleeping red head jumped up at the sound of his name. He stood up gingerly and gave his sensei a lop-sided grin, as the rest of his classmates tried in vain to control their laughter. Turning to his left, he expected Fuji to be there to tell him the answer but then, he remembered.

Fuji wasn't there.

That day, poor Eiji got a detention slip along with a long lecture for not paying attention in class.

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He opened his eyes and cringed at the bright light. Slowly, he sat up and looked around.

He was on the floor in his bedroom.

Fuji realized that he was late. Very late indeed.  
And he had collapsed yet again.

Grabbing his tennis bag and forgetting his medicine, he rushed off for school, without any breakfast, ignoring the nauseating feeling that would soon overcome him.

**To be continued…**  
Hmmm. Is this ok so far? Hope so. :)  
Please review. Thanks.

Spoilers: Fuji finally arrives in school and is just in time for afternoon practice. But what happens when he is forced to run laps under Tezuka's order? Will he continue to hide the truth, or will he suffer in silence?


	5. Chapter 5: Fuji's Struggle

**Letting go**

by akiyume kye

Disclaimer: Until the day I become Takeshi Konomi, I will not own pot.

Pairings: TezuFuji

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**Chapter 5: Fuji's Struggle**

Practice began after school had ended, but still, Kikumaru could see no sign of his best friend.

Though playful as he was, he knew that something was wrong. It wasn't like Fuji to miss school.  
And even if he did, the first person he would inform was him, of course.

Frowning, he trudged over to Oishi and complained to him about his day.  
His partner smiled and reassured the red head that everything would be fine, that Fuji would be all right.

But deep inside, the motherly Oishi wondered if it was true.

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All the tennis club members gathered in the court and waited for Tezuka's instructions for the day.  
"50 laps!" came the command.  
Many groans were heard as everyone set off to complete their laps before anymore was to be given.

The buchou found himself easily irritated and cranky that day, but he could not control himself much longer.  
The tensai still hadn't come.  
And it was affecting him, no matter how much he tried to deny the fact.

He looked to his left, then to his right. Still, there was no Fuji.  
Letting out an exasperated sigh, he slumped down onto a bench and stared into space.

_Fuji… where are you?_

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"Nya! Fuji!" the red head cried out when he saw the tensai.  
Fuji flashed his usual smile and waved back to Kikumaru.

But his face was unusually flushed and he was sweating profusely.

_Bear with it, just bear with it a little longer._ He kept chanting to himself.

Wiping off the sweat from his face, he put down his bag and took out his racket, acting as if nothing was wrong.  
Yet unknown to the world, he was breaking down inside.

Maybe a game or two, that was the most that he could spare.

_Thank goodness everyone has finished running their laps_, Fuji sighed in relief.

As he made his way to the courts where the regulars were practicing, he prayed that everything would go smoothly that day…that he would be able to hang on till practice was over.

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But he was wrong.

He knew that it was going to be yet another torturous day when he saw Tezuka approaching him.  
Fuji braced himself.

"Where have you been? Do you know how late you are?" the buchou lashed out angrily at him.  
_Do you know how worried I've been?_ He had almost said, but decided to let it go.  
Besides, he shouldn't have to worry for someone who had rejected him, should he?

The tensai smiled at him and simply replied, "Gomen ne, I overslept."

"Fine. Then go run 200 laps now."  
Having given the order, Tezuka walked off.

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Echizen and Momoshiro were trying hard to control their laughter when they heard that Fuji had to run 200 laps. Echizen had always been the one to run more laps because he came late most of the time.

But for the tensai, this was a first.

Or perhaps, his last.

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He didn't argue. He didn't even try.  
It would be futile.

Fuji took in a deep breath and began to run around the courts.

1 lap, 2 laps, 3 laps…  
_I'm doing fine, nothing's wrong, I can do this._

10 laps, 15 laps, 20 laps…  
He was panting hard, his vision blurring, his legs threatening to give way.

Still, he continued to run.  
He wouldn't stop.

Because if he did, he would lose…

To himself.

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The buchou watched from afar as Fuji continued with his laps.

He smirked.

Horror then bit into him as he grew stunned by his reaction.  
How could he have found pleasure in seeing the one he loved most struggling to complete his laps?

He should stop it. He should stop this nonsense.

No regular or member had been asked to run 200 laps at a go before.  
Was he out of his mind when he gave Fuji the order?

Fuji had to stop. He had to stop him.

But he found himself immobile as he watched the tensai complete yet another round.

_Run, Fuji, run. Maybe this is the price you have to pay for breaking my heart._

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It was the 70th lap, and Fuji was still running.  
His footsteps were gradually slowing down, and his breathing had become so hard that everyone in the courts could hear him as he ran.

Oishi frowned.  
200 laps was a ridiculous amount to complete, but still, Fuji was one of those who could finish running a hundred laps without even panting hard.

He watched as the tensai continued to run, or rather, as he tried to run.  
Fuji was running in a zig zagged manner, and his face devoid of any color.

The fukubuchou could not stand it any longer as he watched Fuji struggle lap after lap.  
He rushed out of the court, abandoning his game and leaving a surprised Kikumaru standing alone in the court.

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He could barely make out the path before him anymore. The world was spinning around him and he could hardly breathe.  
_I need to take my medicine._

Sweat had thoroughly soaked his regular's shirt and the wind that was blowing left the tensai in chills.  
_Medicine… where is my medicine? _

His legs were wobbly and his movement unsteady. He put out his hand to hold onto the net surrounding the courts for support.  
_Medicine! I need it…now!_

But he couldn't stop.  
Not yet.

Because Tezuka would know that something was wrong if he did.  
Because if he stopped, he might let out the secret that he had hidden for so long.

No, he had to continue.  
He had to sustain.

Maybe, just maybe, he could last till the last lap.  
_Keep running, just keep on running._

_I can do this._

_I hope I can…_

**To be continued…**

How is this chapter? Do let me know. Thanks.

Spoilers: Will Fuji collapse before he finishes his laps? Or will he be able to scrap through the 200 laps in time? What happens when he finds out that he forgot to bring his medicine that day? Will the truth finally be let out? Or will he cover up yet again?

Thanks for all your reviews minna-san!


	6. Chapter 6: Betrayal

**Letting go**

by akiyume kye

Disclaimer: Until the day I become Takeshi Konomi, I will not own pot.

Pairings: TezuFuji

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**Chapter 6: Betrayal**

It wasn't easy.  
Really, it wasn't.

The tensai was slowing down, but still, he couldn't stop.  
If he did, everyone would know.

The secret.  
That dark secret that he had been hiding for such a long time.  
That secret that was eating into him, destroying him, crushing him.

No, he couldn't afford that.  
No one should know.

Not even Yumiko or Yuuta.

No one, no one at all.  
He would rather suffer alone in silence than have the whole world suffer with him.

He had to endure, to persevere.

120 more laps…

_Just keep going… just keep going…_

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"Tezuka! You've got to stop him! Look how much he's struggling!"

The buchou looked up.  
"No," was his reply. "He deserves it."

Oishi was shocked.  
Shocked to hear those words coming from Tezuka.

He had long known of Tezuka's feelings for Fuji, perhaps, even before the other had realized it himself, but he didn't dare to venture into the latter's personal affairs.

_Had there been a quarrel? Had Fuji rejected Tezuka?_  
Thousands of questions flooded his mind, each harder to imagine than the last.

Oishi was worried for Fuji, yet at the same time, content, to know that things were not going well between the two prodigies.  
He had fallen for Tezuka ever since they met each other years ago, but he doubted that the buchou was aware of it at all.  
Tezuka was probably thinking of Fuji most of the time anyway, right?

Right.

And that was what angered Oishi.  
It spurred him to hold on firmly to his position as fukubuchou of the Seigaku Tennis Club.  
It forced him to practice everyday in order to secure his place as a regular.

Yet he could never win Fuji.  
The blue eyed tensai was, well, a tensai. And such people were not easy targets to defeat or overcome.

Lost in his thoughts, Oishi didn't notice that Tezuka had taken hold of his hand and entwined his fingers in his.

Only when the buchou pulled him into his arms, did he realize how close they were.

Confusion played its tune in Oishi's head, preventing him from saying anything audible, as the buchou moved in to close the distance between them.  
He could only stare blankly at Tezuka, the one he desired to own.  
The only one who could make his life complete.

_Tezuka… tell me this isn't a dream…_

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Each breath seemed to be harder to take in than the last.  
Every step was pure torture.

The pain, the agony, the torment.  
Fuji let out a soft groan.

It was too much for the delicate tensai to bear.  
It wasn't fair. Not to someone like him.

He deserved better, he deserved more.  
Not more laps, but more love.

More fairness, not despair.  
More joy, not sorrow.

Fuji felt betrayed.  
What had he done? Why were things the way they were?  
Why couldn't he have the chance to be with the one that he loved?

_Why? _Fuji screamed inside. _Why? Why me?_  
There were many questions, but no answer.

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Tezuka held Oishi close to him.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Fuji turning round the bend, running towards where he and Oishi were standing.

5, 4, 3, 2 … He would be approaching very soon.

The buchou's heart was palpitating. A drop of sweat trickled down his neck.  
He was uncertain. He was afraid.

He shouldn't be doing this.  
He shouldn't be.

But Tezuka wanted to show him.  
To show Fuji that he didn't need him.

_I'll show you, Fuji… I'll show you…_

Taking in a deep breath, he leaned over and placed his lips on Oishi's.

_There… do you see it now, Fuji? I don't need you. _

_I don't._

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It was as if the world had crashed down upon him.  
A thunderstorm that drenched him in a sea of sorrow and hopelessness.

At that instant, Fuji's heart broke into a million fragments.  
The instant he had seen Tezuka and Oishi… kissing.

It couldn't be true. It just couldn't be.

Not Tezuka, not Oishi.  
No, it just wasn't right.

He wanted to scream. He wanted to grab Tezuka and ask him why.  
He wanted to run away from what he had seen.

He wanted to escape from everything around him.

He wanted...  
to die.

**To be continued…**

How was this chapter? I would greatly appreciate reviews:)

Next chapter: Fuji continues to run. But this time, away from crushing reality. His ability to pull through will only depend on his will to go on. With the sorrow that grips his heart, will he be able to?


	7. Chapter 7: Trouble

**Letting go**

by akiyume kye

Disclaimer: Until the day I become Takeshi Konomi, I will not own pot.

Pairings: TezuFuji

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**Chapter 7: Trouble**

_Flashback_

"_Do you believe in love that lasts forever?" Fuji asked._

_The buchou looked up, and hesitated for a moment._  
"_Yes."_

_The tensai chuckled. He was getting used to hearing these one word answers from Tezuka. "Saa… is it possible?"_

"_Why not?" _

_Fuji smiled. "What if it wasn't mutual? Will you still continue to love that person?"_

"_I will love only one person till the day I die."  
Tezuka shifted in his chair. The topic was making him uncomfortable._

"_Ahh. That's so sweet. I wonder who that lucky person is." _

_Tezuka stood up, took his books and pushed in his chair._  
"_Perhaps someone you already know too well."_

_End of Flashback_

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_Was I wrong?  
Was I wrong to think that it was me?_

Fuji couldn't move.

He could only continue to stare at the scene that lay before him.  
A scene that he never expected he would see.

_Tezuka… Was it all a lie?_

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Slowly, he pulled away from Oishi.

It was wrong. This was all wrong.  
How could he have done it?  
What could have possessed him to.. to kiss Oishi?

He didn't even love the fukubuchou.  
There was no future between them.  
Only friendship, nothing else.

Tezuka knew that Oishi had feelings for him, but he couldn't bring himself to accept it.  
His heart still belonged to Fuji, as much as he refused to admit it.

He looked up and saw the stunned expression on Fuji's face.  
Tezuka's heart broke.

He couldn't bear to see Fuji suffer this way.

But reality struck him once again. There it was, the deep void in his heart.  
Fuji had rejected him, hadn't he?

The painful memory was fresh in Tezuka's mind.

The way Fuji had screamed at him.  
The way Fuji had pushed him away.

The way Fuji had destroyed their future.

Anger surged within the buchou.  
_I'll show you again, Fuji Syuusuke. I'll show you that I don't need you.  
Ever. _

With that, he leaned over to kiss Oishi again.  
It came easier this time, but only because he had pictured himself holding the prodigy.

His arms wrapped possessively around Oishi, despite the knowledge of the eyes that were watching his every move.

The eyes… of a broken tensai.

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He couldn't bear to see it anymore.  
No, he couldn't.

It was too painful.  
Pain, that magnified the sorrow which had already engulfed his heart.  
But he couldn't wallow in despair. He couldn't.

Fuji started running again.  
He had to run, he had to escape from the myriad of emotions that would soon overcome.  
He had to flee from this insanity. He had to push himself beyond his limits.

Running had gradually become a part of his life, one, that wouldn't leave him no matter how hard he tried.  
Everything he feared, everything he disliked, he ran away from.

He had to, or he would lose to himself.  
He had to, even if it meant losing his life.

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Oishi pushed Tezuka back.  
He wanted more, more of Tezuka Kunimitsu, but it was… embarrassing.

He didn't want to be caught sharing a kiss with the buchou in public.

"Tezuka…" Oishi gulped. "Maybe we should stop…"

The look on Tezuka's face was hard to decipher.  
There was a mixture of horror and alarm.

Oishi couldn't tell.

But before he could say anything else, the buchou ran off, an image of a distraught young man fleeing from the absurdity of his actions.

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He peered into the gents, but Tezuka wasn't there.

The club room, too, was empty.

Oishi scratched his head.  
_Where could he have gone?_

He glanced at his watch and sighed.  
It was time to dismiss them.

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He couldn't breathe.  
It was excruciating. It was exhausting.

He felt his lungs caving in and his legs losing their strength.

Every ounce of energy in him had vanished.  
He couldn't run anymore.

He needed a doctor.  
He needed his medicine.  
He needed to stop.

His vision was flickering, his pulse weakening.  
Sweat was trickling down his forehead.

_Why?_ He wanted to scream, but no audible sound came out from his dry pale lips.  
His throat was parched and sore, his head throbbing in pain.

_Why, Tezuka, why? Why must you do this to me?_

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By the time Oishi found his way back to the courts, barely anyone was there.

Looking around, he found that the buchou had already returned to dismiss the tennis players.  
Smiling to himself, he walked over to where the buchou was standing.

But he wasn't just standing there. He was lecturing the regulars.

"…go home now! He will finish the laps on his own!" Tezuka shouted at the group.  
Having made his point clear, he turned away and headed for the club room.

Oishi was confused.  
He looked over to Eiji and tried to catch his eye but the red head refused to look at him.

After several unsuccessful attempts, he finally gave up in frustration and approached Eiji.  
"Eiji! What is going on? What's wrong?"

His worries were met with eyes full of hatred and grieve.

"What's wrong?" Eiji asked, his words laced thick with sarcasm.  
"Nothing's wrong! Everything's fine! Everything's great! So why don't you go enjoy yourself with your boyfriend?"

Daggers shot out from Eiji's eyes, each piercing through the fukubuchou's heart.  
_What happened? Why is Eiji so mad at me? _

Oishi frowned. He wanted to know why.  
He reached out to grab Eiji, to hold him back, to ask him why, but the boy slipped out of his grasp and sped away.

"Go away!"

He was first shocked, then a torch was lit and anger flooded him.  
Eiji had never acted this way.  
He had lost his temper before, but never had he spoken to Oishi with such a harsh tone.

The anger in him was boiling, it was infuriating.  
Oishi was on the verge of lambasting anyone in his path when something struck him.

Wait a minute.  
_Boyfriend?  
What boyfriend?_

No… it couldn't be.  
Eiji couldn't have seen it.  
No, not Eiji, no.

"He saw it."

Oishi spun around quickly and met the eyes of Tezuka.  
His worst fears were confirmed.

_Eiji…_

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_I hate him! I hate him!_

Tears streaked his face.  
Eiji was mad. Really mad.

Did Oishi think that he was stupid?  
Did he think that he wouldn't have found out?

It was so open. A scene for everyone to see.  
Did Oishi think they could hide it?

_Dream on!_

A fresh batch of tears streamed down his cheeks as he continued to sob on the cold floor.

_You liar! You cheater!  
I hate you!_

He wiped the last tear off.  
_I hate you, Oishi, I hate you!_

With that, he stormed out of the toilet.

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Tezuka picked up his bag and reached out for Oishi's.

Oishi only remained silent as Tezuka passed his bag to him.  
He took his bag, and walked off, not waiting for the buchou.

He wasn't paying attention to anything, lost in his own thoughts, until he crashed into someone.

When he looked up, he saw Eiji sprawled on the ground, hand covering his arm where he had been cut in the fall.

"Eiji! Ah.. Gomen!"  
Oishi bent down to help Eiji, but was rudely pushed away by the other.

"I don't need your help." He spat in disgust.

Oishi took a step back. Keen, poignant agony shot through him, and he wondered if the emptiness that he felt that instant would ever go away.

Momoshiro came by to help the red head up, looked at pair with animosity in his eyes, and walked off with Eiji.

"He should be fine. Let's go." Tezuka said, without much emotion.

Unsure of what to do, the raven haired boy nodded and acquiesced.

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Fuji fell.

But no one saw him.

He was hidden by the wall.  
He was drained. He was exhausted. He was dying.

He couldn't breathe. He hadn't any energy to.  
He needed his medicine, but he couldn't get up.

_Am I going to die here?_  
Fuji let out a bitter laugh.  
_Maybe__that would be better than living, _he mused.

He propped himself up against the wall.  
_Maybe… maybe…_

His eyes were closing. His pulse was fading.

His time was coming.

He was falling… deeper and deeper, right into the depths of the abyss.

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"Senpai…you sure you'll be fine? You don't look so good." Momoshiro called out to Eiji as he stepped out of the doorway.

Eiji tried his best reassure his kouhai with his normal grin, but instead, it came out as a sad smile. In his weak attempt to put up a deceptive front that meekly hid his emotions, he managed to say, "Daijoubu."

The second year prankster seemed unwilling to leave him alone, but gave him a wave, slammed the door and ran off to catch up with the other regulars.

Eiji stood up. He looked at the plaster that Momo had pasted untidily over his wound.

Tears sprang into his eyes yet again, glistening with agony and sorrow, as he ripped off the plaster and yelped in pain.  
_Oishi would have done a better job…_

_But he's a liar! I hate him!  
I hate him!_

Eiji bit his lip.  
No, he shouldn't cry over people like him.

Staring unseeingly into the floor, he felt alone and strangely detached from his surroundings, abandoned by the one he sought refuge in, cast away by the person of his dreams.

He needed Fuji.  
He needed to confide in his best friend.

It was only then, that Eiji realized he hadn't seen the tensai for quite some time.  
He opened the door and called out, "Fuji! Are you still there?"

The wind was blowing gently. The sun was setting in the horizon.  
The evening scene was tranquil and peaceful.

Eiji waited.

But there was no answer.

**To be continued…**  
Please review! Hope you guys enjoyed it!

Next chapter: Will Eiji find Fuji before it is too late? What will happen, now that he knows the truth?


	8. Chapter 8: Disturbance

**Letting go**

by akiyume kye

Disclaimer: Until the day I become Takeshi Konomi, I will not own pot.

Pairings: TezuFuji

* * *

**Chapter 8: Disturbance**

After much squabbling and arguing, they finally decided to fill their stomachs at the fast food restaurant nearby.

Momoshiro was the first to rush in to order his usual: 5 double beef burgers, 3 milk shakes, 6 packets of large fries…the list went on.

The rest, however, were much quieter that day.  
Their thoughts went back to a certain blue eyed tensai who was, perhaps, still struggling to complete his laps in school.

Kawamura had a look of utter sadness on his face.  
He was disappointed that he couldn't even lend his good friend a helping hand, to run alongside him, to offer him words of encouragement as he ran.

Fuji had always been there for him.

He was the one who would pat the shy boy's back and say, "Gambatte ne, Taka-san."  
He was the only one who bothered to care, who bothered to notice the things that were happening around him.

No one else would ask him how things were going about at home, or if his father was still on his case for putting aside taking over his trade for tennis.

Only Fuji did. Only Fuji cared.

The sensitive young tensai saw him.  
He saw Kawamura as he was.

Others would look at him, but never into him.

Only Fuji would.

He felt important in the eyes of the prodigy.  
He felt like a somebody, a person with emotions that mattered.

Yet he could only stand and watch as the tensai ran lap after lap, lap after lap.

He wasn't bright, but he could sense it.  
_Something is wrong with Fuji._

But the blue eyed boy wouldn't say anything, would he?  
He was kind, too kind, to allow his woes to burden any other.

And even if he did want to say it, why would Fuji choose to confide in him?

In his heart, he felt that he was the least important member of the team, only needed in the battle of power, only seen when he won.  
He was mostly placed as the reserve, one, who people will count on only if there were no others.

Sometimes, Kawamura wondered if anyone would notice if he had disappeared.  
Fuji, perhaps, but no one else.

So why would Fuji want to pour out his troubles to a loser like him?  
He may find Eiji, he may approach the motherly Oishi, but he would never come to him, Kawamura Takashi, a loser, a nobody.

Still, he wished he could do something for the boy. The boy who had done wonders in his life.

A thought struck him, and he thought of making the latter's favourite wasabe sushi for him.  
_Maybe I can pop over at his house to pass it to him tonight!_

Glad that he had finally thought of something he could offer to the tensai, he rushed out of the burger shop, without saying "goodbye" and headed home to make the sushi.

_No one will notice if I'm gone anyway…_

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Silence continued to scream across the two young men as they walked side by side down the street.

Oishi couldn't think of anything to say, not that he actually tried.  
His heart was heavy and troubled, and he couldn't stop thinking about the red head.

_Go away!_

_I don't need your help!_

Tears stung his eyes. He knew his actions had hurt Eiji.  
He was sorry, but still, he didn't want to give up the newly blossomed relationship between Tezuka and him.

Not even for Eiji, no, he wouldn't.  
He couldn't.

Eiji had to understand. He had to understand how long he had been waiting for this.  
The chance to be with Tezuka. The chance to be loved by the buchou.

_Do you know how long it has been, Eiji?  
Do you know how long I've been waiting for this?  
Why don't you understand? Why?_

He longed for Eiji to understand, to accept it, but Oishi knew why it was hard for him.

It was because of that promise. The promise he had made to him.  
And Oishi wished that he could take it all back.

"Tell me."

Oishi looked up at Tezuka with confused eyes. "Tell you what?"

Brown hazel eyes gazed down at him, as if reading his mind, his heart.  
Oishi felt exposed. He felt like he was trapped in a cage, running round and round in circles, but never finding escape.

He felt intimidated, he was afraid.

There was something different about him, but Oishi couldn't put a finger to it.  
The way he had kissed him, the way he now walked beside him…

There was something different.

Yet in his heart, he was content, knowing that the buchou felt for him, that he cared.

But still…

His thoughts went back to Eiji again.  
He racked his brains but couldn't think of anything he could do except to remain quiet and let the other boy find him like he always would.

No more words were exchanged as the pair continued their walk home in awkward silence.

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She was getting worried.

Looking over at the clock for the twentieth time that day, she paced to and fro in the spacious living room of the Fuji household.

Fuji was supposed to be back an hour ago. They were supposed to visit Yuuta at his dorm together that day. It was meant as a birthday surprise for the youngest child, one, that Fuji had painfully planned for months.

Yet he wasn't here.

Yumiko was frustrated. Frustrated at her younger brother.

He had become more and more irresponsible lately, either conveniently forgetting to wash up the dinner plates or not even bothering to help her around in her daily chores.

She was getting impatient. His attitude was disturbing her.  
And she was angry.

Tired from her work that day, she had expected Fuji to have, at the least, welcomed her home or made her a cup of warm tea.

But not only wasn't he home, she had also received a call from his school.

"_Fuji-san, your brother did not attend his lessons for the whole day today. His has also not been handing in any of his assignments. Is something wrong with him?" _

"_Ahh.. he… he wasn't feeling well so I told him to rest at home for the day… as for his assignments, I don't know… maybe he forgot. He is a very responsible boy, sensei. He must have forgotten." Yumiko lied through her teeth._

"_Hmm.. but Fuji-san, his coach tells me that he did go for tennis practice in the afternoon.," Fuji's sensei replied hesistantly._

"_He did? Oh he must have been feeling much better by then. I'll have a talk with him later."_

She felt like screaming, she felt like lashing out at her brother.  
He was usually so sensible, and she wondered what had gotten into him.

Anger boiling over, she grabbed her purse and stormed out of the house, leaving for Yuuta's dorm without waiting any longer for the tensai.

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Ryoma watched as his senpai finished yet another burger.  
He was positive that Momoshiro did not chew his food. He practically inhaled them.

"Cheh. This is boring," the youngest Regular complained.

Momo was too busy stuffing himself that he didn't hear the boy at all.

Rolling his eyes, Ryoma turned to face Inui, who was staring into his precious notebook, a frown forming on his face.

"Echizen," Inui started. "Did you notice that Eiji has been acting weird 99.8 percent of the time in the friendly match today? His acrobatic play which comes out 87.2 percent of the time only showed itself less than 25.6 percent in the match. Hmmm. Wait maybe it was 25.5 percent…"  
He abandoned his conversation with Ryoma and began scribbling into his notebook again.

"Fshh. It's late. I'm leaving."

Kaidoh turned towards Inui, expecting him to follow, but the third year just continued with his calculations. Surprised at his slight disappointment, the snake like boy shook his head and took his leave.

Raising his eyebrow, Ryoma let out a sigh.  
_Why is everybody acting so weird today?_

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"Fuji! Fujiiii!"

_Strange_, he thought. _I'm sure Fuji was here just a while ago._  
Peering back into the tennis club room, he saw Fuji's bag lying on the floor.

_His bag is still here… Where could he be?_

Stepping out of the room, he surveyed the courts.  
There was no one in sight.

Eiji walked around the courts, thinking that maybe his best friend was deliberately hiding from him, or that he had lost something and he was searching for it.

He scanned the area.  
Still no sign of Fuji.

Eiji continued to walk.  
He turned round a corner, and then another.

The tears in his eyes were beginning to form again.

He felt so alone.  
He felt that Fuji didn't care about him anymore.  
He felt isolated in the cold cruel world he was in.

_Nobody cares about me, _he thought to himself sadly.

Eiji's vision was blurred by his tears, but he didn't bother to wipe them off.  
He needed to let it out.  
Controlling his emotions had become unbearable.

Walking on, he decided to call out for the tensai again. "Fuji! Fuji.. sniff…Fuji where are-"

The red head had tripped over something and fallen over, grazing his arm again.  
Struggling to get up, he winced in pain, turned around and wondered what he had tripped over.

Eiji's stomach did a flip as a soft gasp escaped his throat.

-

It was Fuji.

* * *

**To be continued…**

AHHH! I know this chapter wasn't well written but… was it really that bad? sigh. Do review!

I promise I will tell you guys more of what happens to Fuji in the next chapter if you still want to know after this horrendous chapter. :( Sorry for dragging this for so long!

Ok, let's analyze the situation and see.

Fuji forgot to bring his medicine, Yumiko left the house without him… and worst of all, Fuji doesn't have his keys.  
So when Eiji brings a dying Fuji home, he realizes that there is no Yumiko, no key, and that means… no medicine.  
What will he do now? Is there any hope left for Fuji?

Anyway, saw some authors doing this so I thought I'd give it a go. Me on my "trying spree" again. :D

Fuji: (Knocks on the door)

Me: What?

Fuji: Can you hurry up and tell me if I'm gonna die or not?

Me: Don't know, don't care. Now go away and lemme sleep.

Ryoma: Ii yaada! I"m bored. Make me do something.

Me: It's my holiday, and I WANT MY SLEEP!

Eiji: Nyah! Why did you give me so many cuts? (whines in pain)

Me: (rolls eyes) Cheh. Go figure.

Oishi: AHH! Eiji is hurt? Evil author! What are you doing to him!

Me: (innocent look) Me? I ain't doin no nothin'.

Oishi: EIJIIIIIIII! Where are you? Do you need a plaster? A bandage? A doctor?

Eiji: KYE-CHAN! I am NOT talking to meanies like him.

Me: Okok fine. Oishi, shoo. Go away. Eiji's mad at you.

Oishi: As if i don't know.

Eiji: Then quit bugging me.

Me: Thought you didn't want to talk to him?

Eiji: Nyah! Kye-chan!

Me: (shrugs) What? You said so yourself.

Fuji: Is somebody ever going to tell me if I'm gonna die or not? (blue eyes flashing)

Oishi: Eiji don't be mad! I'm sorry!

Eiji: NOT TALKING!

Me: (sighs and looks at Ryoma) What doya think?

Ryoma: (tips his hat and looks away) Mada mada dane.

* * *

Suggestions will be greatly appreciated. :) 


	9. Chapter 9: Panic in the Dark

**Letting go**

by akiyume kye

**Disclaimer: **Until the day I become Takeshi Konomi, I will not own pot.

**Pairings: **TezuFuji

**

* * *

Chapter 9: Panic in the Dark**

He dusted off the dirt on his arm and cringed when some sand went into the cut he had gotten.

Looking at Fuji, he was exasperated to find the tensai peacefully leaning against the wall.  
Anger and bitterness clouded Eiji eyes, and he failed to see how pale and weak his best friend was.

"Fuji! How could you just rest here when I was looking for you? sniff.. Do you know what Oishi did? I saw him and… Nyahh, Fuji! Are you even listening to me?"

Angry that the tensai wasn't responding, he pushed Fuji out of frustration, stood up in a huff and turned away, folding his arms.

"Even you don't care anymore!… sniff… All of you are so mean. I hate all of you! I hate all of… eh?… Fuji?"

The red head spun around.

Fuji was on the floor, skin deathly pale, unmoving.

Eiji gasped.  
"Fujjjiiii!"

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"RRRIIING! RRIINNGG!" The phone rang.

He waited. No one picked it up.  
Just as he was about to put it down, somebody answered.

"Moshimoshi?"  
It wasn't Eiji.

Swallowing his disappointment, Oishi politely greeted the red head's mother and asked for him.

"Eiji? He isn't home yet. That playful boy… I'm sure he's with Momoshiro-kun and his other friends eating somewhere. Why don't you call back later?"

Defeat was written all over his face.  
"It's ok. Arigatoo."

Sighing, Oishi pressed the "stop" button and put the phone down.

It wasn't like Eiji to be out so late. Besides, he had an important test the next day to study for.  
The red head had failed his other tests, and he couldn't afford to fail this one too.

Oishi wanted to go over to help his doubles partner in his work, but now…

His eyebrows crinkled in a frown.  
Picking up the phone again, he dialed Eiji's number.

"Sorry, but the number you have dialed is not available. Please try again later."

The usually calm and composed fukubuchou glared angrily at the phone, as if it had been the cause of his annoyance at the red head. Throwing the phone against the door of his room, he collapsed into his bed and sobbed his wretched soul out.

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His heart was beating fast. His mind was racing but he couldn't think of anything he could do.

Eiji held the unconscious tensai in his arms and cradled him gently, as if that could wake him up.

Panic bit into him and he broke out in cold sweat.  
What was he going to do?  
Where was he going to bring Fuji?

Seeing his best friend in this state scared him.

Fuji had never fallen sick.  
He was thin, and he was delicate, but Eiji had never seen him like this before.

He bit his lip and trembled visibly.  
Shaking Fuji with all he had, he called the tensai's name again and again.

But there was no response.

"Fuji! sniff.. Fujjjiii! Wake up! Fuji…" Tears were streaming down his face and Eiji wept in despair.

Fuji's body was getting colder and colder, but still, Eiji didn't know what to do.

_Oishi! Oishi can help!_ He thought.  
Pushing aside the painful events of the day, he reached into his pocket and turned on his phone.

Gingerly dialing his doubles partner's number, Eiji fervently prayed that the tensai was alive.

He tried to feel for a pulse, but he could find none.  
Fuji was so pale that Eiji thought he was a ghost.  
His hair was in a mess, his arms freezing cold, his lips cracked and dry.

The phone rang, and the red head wished that Oishi would pick it up quickly.  
It rang and rang until he reached the answering machine.  
"Sorry, but we are unable to answer your call now. Please leave a message aft-"

Eiji's battery died out and the call was cut off before he could even say anything.  
He stared at the useless phone in his hand and gripped it tight in anger.

He knew that Oishi was at home. The fukubuchou never went out at night.

_Oishi… you did that on purpose, didn't you?_

Struggling to hold back his tears, the red head threw his phone aside in disgust and tried to lift the unmoving tensai up.  
Eiji was tired, and he hadn't eaten his dinner.  
His strength had depleted and he collapsed back onto the ground with Fuji.

"Fuji! Fuji... please wake up! I'm scared… Fuji…"

Eiji shook his best friend and waited for a response.

But it never came.

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Sitting at his desk, Ryoma wondered why he had even bothered to take out his textbook.  
The test tomorrow was English and he could ace it easily with two eyes closed.

Restless, he sauntered lazily down the stairs to find his father for a quick game of tennis.  
The living room was empty and neither was he in the kitchen.

"Ah! Ryoma-san! Oji-san is asleep in his room. He's had a rough time doing his odd jobs today, you know." Nanako told Ryoma.

Nodding nonchalantly at her reply, the young tennis regular bent down to scope Karupin in his arms. The Himalayan cat meowed contentedly as Ryoma cradled it slowly.

He got himself a glass of cold milk and sat himself down in the kitchen.  
_This is going to be a long, boring night,_ he thought.

Karupin snuggled up onto Ryoma and purred softy, wanting some milk to drink. Smiling, he picked the cat up and brought it near his glass to have a sip.

Suddenly, it wriggled out of his grip, knocking down the glass of milk and disappeared out of the cat hole of the main door.

"Karupin!" Ryoma cried out after the cat.

Ignoring the mess that Karupin had created, Ryoma quickly slipped on a pair of shoes and chased after the cat, leaving poor Nanako to clean up the spilt milk.

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He took one step, and then another.

"Nyah! I can't do this!" Eiji whined in frustration.

Bracing himself again, he heaved Fuji onto his back and tried to walk a step further.

It was hard work, carrying the tensai back to the tennis club room in the dark, chilling night.

His back was aching and they had hardly moved from the spot Fuji was at before that.  
One step… Two steps…

They fell to the ground again. Eiji grimaced at the cuts he had received from the falls and winced in pain when he touched them. He had taken great care to make sure that every time they fell, Fuji would fall onto him. After all, it had always been Fuji, allowing Eiji to fall onto him, catching him, protecting him…

Eiji's eyes grew misty at the sight of Fuji's pale face.

_Fuji…_

A tear trickled down his cold cheeks and fell onto Fuji's. Quickly, he used his shirt to wipe off the tear on Fuji's face.

As he did that, Fuji stirred.

The red head pushed himself away out of shock but promptly rushed back to the tensai's side.

"Fuji! Fuji can you hear me?"

The blue eyed boy's eyes remained closed as he mouthed something inaudible. Eiji strained to hear what he was saying and vaguely made out the words "bag" and "medicine".

It was then that something struck Eiji.

He remembered the day when Oishi was telling him about what he had seen in Fuji's bag.

-

_ Eiji, has Fuji told you anything confidential lately?_

_ Nyah? I don't think so._

_ You're sure?_

_ Eh? I'm sure. But why are you asking?_

_ Eiji… is Fuji sick? Really sick?_

_ Sick? FUJI IS SICK? How come I don't know about it?_

_ It's just a guess. Tezuka was looking into Fuji's bag and he took out packets and packets of tablets. _

_ Are? Why does he have so many of them?_

_ That's what I want to find out too._

_- _

Those tablets! Eiji gasped.

-

_ Eiji… Is Fuji sick? Really sick?_

_- _

He looked over at Fuji.

-

_ Tezuka was looking into Fuji's bag and he took out packets and packets of tablets._

_- _

_Fuji…_

Could it be true? That all this while, the tensai was suffering from something as deadly as this?  
That it would leave him almost dying, pale, and barely breathing?

Was he hiding it all this while? Was he running, and suffering in silence?

Swallowing down the truth, he quickly assured Fuji that he would get his medicine from his bag and return to him soon.

He ran, as fast as he could to the tennis club room. He turned the knob and…

It couldn't open.

"NOOOO!"

* * *

**To be continued…**  
How was this chapter? Gomen. I guess I kinda strayed from my initial story line so bear with me. :D 

Spoilers:  
The door is locked; Fuji is left out in the cold, and… Eiji gets mistaken for a burglar trying to break into the club room.  
That can only mean one thing: BIG trouble.

Ok this is fun so I'll try it again. :D

Eiji: I'm hungryyy!

Me: Cheh. Like I'm not.

Eiji: Nyahh! And now I'm going to be a burglar!

Me: (tries not to laugh) heh… well…

Oishi: Eiji! How can you think of stealing? No, no, no, no, no… (pulls out his hair (not like he has much))

Eiji: KYE-CHAN! Tell him I'm not talking to him!

Me: Oishi, he is not talking to you.

Ryoma: (rolls eyes at the ridiculous conversation) Neh, can you just tell me where Karupin is?

Me: It… (drammmmaaatic pause) … died.

Ryoma: WHAT! YOU…

Me: Heh… Joking! (cheeky grin)

Fuji: Ahem. And I'm left out there in the cold? Thanks a lot.

Me: Making you suffer is part of my plan. (evil laughter)

Fuji: (shows his scary face)

Me: erm.. and then again…

Fuji: Take that back or suffer my wrath.

Me: Ii yaada.

Ryoma: Hey! That's my line.

Me: (sticks out tongue) Too bad, I'm the author here.

Fuji: If you don't…

Oops, Fuji is starting to sound a _little_ psychotic so I had better stop here. :p

* * *

Please R&R! 


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